DON'T FUCK WITH TEXAS TODAY!No, I'm serious. They'll kill you today. Just ask this guy.....

Got the point? Good. Nothing sucks more than your wife trying to put your head back together. That's just awkward for everyone involved.
Remember to give thanks tomorrow. Also fuck over an Indian and steal some land. Its all good, God told you to do it.
And please, please, please try my new Holiday recipe.
Enjoy!